Busy... Disturb..

This week has been very busy for me. I started working now and we are preparing for our overnight on November 1. Been back to working and its really stressful. I have to wake up early then i have to go home late.. :( . i was adjusting with the system, that i have to wake up at around 8am so i can prepare for work. When i was not working anymore, i handle my own time, now its different. Well first week of work was been busy but it was quite fun too. I see familiar faces but frankly i don't feel welcome. lol. i feel out of place. i don't know what i feel, maybe i just let myself not be in the crowd. still adjusting? i really don't know. one thing what i hate working, is when i go home. i go home empty. mom is not there anymore to check up on me. :( . no more conversations with my mom. it makes me miss her more. i thought this will help me to move on, i hope it will still help me to move on. But good thing my sister is there for me, she's checking up on me. I just don't want to feel alone. I never used to be alone. but when mom was gone, i let myself feel alone. ironic right? i really don't know.. im confused and still fixing myself with the lose of my mother. And its all souls day, i really dont want to go home when we visit mom in the cementery. I feel safe there, cause i know she's there. I just hope ill be ok and able to move on.